Four models committed to shooting this week. Three cancelled. I am to shoot the fourth today, a feminist painter. We'll see. I do not hold out much hope. I am sick of working with people. I am sick of me. I want to stop and start over. We'll see.
I was given a bottle of tranquilizers that have marked on them "for sleep." They are capsules, sort of aqua and pink. I can't find on any drug chart on the internet what they are. I remember the drug name ends in "pam" but I can't remember which "pam" they are. But. . . (link). I am told they require a full eight hours and if I get up before then, I will not remember the things I do. They are mind, not body, tranquilizers. What if I put my mind down and do not get it back? A blessing and a curse, perhaps.
I did not have a date. I was being foolish.
* * * * *
I took the drug. I woke at four.
ReplyDeleteMarked "for sleep" -- reminds me of Alice in Wonderland "eat me, drink me" for some reason.
Why don't you play it safe, shoot up some heroine!
ReplyDeleteAt least you'll know what you put in your body and... it will work... for a little while.
Goddamned, you make me angry, you need a good spanking, like the foolish little boy that you are!
:-P
XXX anyway.
http://www.cesar.umd.edu/cesar/drugs/rohypnol.asp
ReplyDeleteFlunitrazepam.
I have known these very well for many years.
GOOD LUCK!
L, There is an element of that, I think.
ReplyDeleteN, I am not ready for heroin, but I'd love some opium.