Corps and Cops

The Google Cops are after me again.  They put a warning on yesterday's post on one blog but not the other.  Titties, I guess.  "Community Standards."  My "community" doesn't mind titties.  Or dicks or anything else.  Their's is an authoritarian community, I guess.  There is no freedom throughout the land.  You are allowed to lie and promote conspiracy theories, but no titties . 

Whatever.  It scares me.  Most days, now, I have to try two or three times to upload a photo.  I don't know what is up with that.  I have a whole lotta writing on the blog that I don't wish to see disappear.  One day it might.  I guess I should know better than to count on authoritarians to protect you.  

The crazy thing is that I've been a fan and supporter of The Google.  By and large, anyway.  But as we are learning, you can't count on anything anymore.  Nothing.  Not even that rock of ages, nature.  The seasons shift.  Precipitation patterns get disrupted.  Distant stars explode and meteors strike the land.  

I go to see the surgeon in a little bit.  It is my last day on the poison, on the antibiotics.  I've felt like Fido's ass for over a week.  I'm hoping that my mind and vision clear and that I regain some vitality.  I am not like myself now.  It is frightening.  I barely move.  I have no "gumption."  Nothing interests me but sleeping.  If it is not the drugs, then I am in big trouble.  

I'll know more this afternoon.  Fingers crossed.  I hope he is a good surgeon.  How do you know?  In every profession, some are better than others.  There are Top Dogs and there are just Plain Dogs.  Trying to ferret the good ones out is a daunting task.  There is no scale to look at.  And so. . . wishing and hoping are my only tools.  

I've set a goal to work toward--the website.  I dedicated two hours to culling old work yesterday.  I didn't even make it through the San Fran pictures, but it felt good to be working at something.  I need some purpose in life other than going to the gym, bathing, eating and sleeping.  

I hadn't seen anyone in two days, and when I went to my mother's in the afternoon, my voice wouldn't work.  I haven't spoken much for days.  My voice was just a raspy wheezing.  It took half an hour before it cleared. 

Terrifying.  

I've not been eating much.  Bad belly, nausea.  So last night, I decided I'd try making up a dish.  I chopped extra-firm tofu into blocks and powdered them with corn starch and flour.  I heated olive oil in a cast iron pan on medium high heat and let the tofu cook for 3-4 minutes per side.  Then I plated them and put more olive oil in the pot and added chopped garlic and fresh spinach leaves.  As they began to wilt, I added garbanzo beans.  Salt and cayenne pepper.  In a minute, I added the tofu back to the pot, turned off the flame, and let it sit for another minute.  Plated, I added toasted sesame seeds and teriyaki sauce.  

That was an easy meal to get down and darn good, too.  

Remember I told you that "Sugar" was sort of made for adults?  Last night, it got weird in a sci-fi way.  Really disappointing.  I'm six or seven episodes in and can say that it didn't need that.  Now what?  I'll try another episode tonight, I guess, but I don't have a good feeling.  Why do people need the ridiculous and impossible to pique their interest?  Why do they need fantasy and horror?  There is enough horror in things that are not fantasy or supernatural.  

I don't get it, at lest beyond adolescence.  

But don't use me as a measuring stick.  I'm way outside the norm.  

I won't post any titties today or maybe ever.  But I've had posts that were flagged that didn't even have a human form in them, so I don't know wtf Google Corp is looking at.  I DO know that I can't post pictures of children with guns.  I posted a home movie from the 1950s on YouTube that got flagged because my father and I were pointing toy guns at the camera like real bandits.  I can almost understand that one, but the human form?  Pretty f'ing weird to me.  

I heard a good one yesterday.  I'd take more music like this.  Let me share it with you.  It is a pleasant end to a pretty shitty blog post.  I'll let you know what the surgeon says.  Wish me luck.