The Old Old

Originally Posted Sunday, January 26, 2014

I turned down a date with a twenty-two year old last night.  Well, I didn't actually turn it down.  It wasn't a date, either, perhaps.  The woman was supposed to stop by the studio in the late afternoon/early evening and we were to walk uptown and get some drinks.  I said yes to that in the early afternoon.  But I ate some Thai noodle soup left over from the night before and got a severe pain in my belly.  I didn't feel good and didn't really want to go out.  But dutifully I went to the studio and began to work sleeving prints (I calculate that I have about $300,000.00 worth right now).  Later, she texted.  Our plans were changing.  She was going to bring her three year old.  O.K. I said.  Later she asked if I could come pick them up.  I didn't feel good and was getting the hebejebes, but said O.K.  Then she texted to say the girl was asleep.  Good, I thought, a way out.  I texted back and said let her sleep, we can do this another time.  A bit later, I got a text that said, "I got a babysitter."  I ignored that for about half an hour as I kept working, then texted back my apology and said I could pick her up.  She must have been making other plans, and I didn't hear back which was perfect.  Half an hour later, though, I got a text that said, "Sure."  I responded that I was ass deep in a project and maybe we could do it another time.  Whatever was good for me, she said.

I was relieved.  Maybe I am just getting old, I thought, but my stomach still hurt and I was glad that I could go home and chill.  I kept working until I reached a natural stopping point and went home.  Eight o'clock.  I thought to eat but wasn't hungry, so I heated up a can of Amy's Organic Butternut Squash Soup.  Now there's a tasteless meal if you ever want one.  But it was right for my belly.  I ate it and watched some horrible movie about magicians with major comic stars and Steve Buscemi but the only thing that was worth watching was Alan Arkin who is always fun to watch.  After that I watched a very bad heavyweight fight on HBO, and then I took myself to bed. 

"You could be out with a pretty girl," I thought, but I was feeling better off this way.  Maybe, I thought for the ten hundredth time, I am finally getting old. 

I picked up my iPad and watched episodes two and three of "Banshee" on Cinemax Go.  It was after midnight. 

I woke this morning to a gray room.  It was seven-thirty and the sun was not rising today.  I tried to shake myself into motion, but I was feeling achy.  I made the coffee and read the news.  My nose was running.  I had a slightly sore throat. 

"Ah-ha!"I said.  Not actually, but metaphorically.  I, I said to myself, am not old, I am sick.  It is understandable.  There, I said again to the only person in the room, is the answer. 

But it isn't, is it.  The girl. . . she's very pretty and better, she is sexy.  Sickness would be no deterrent to that, I think, to some young fellow looking to take over the world.  Only to the old and prudent. 

I don't know, though.  I feel pretty lousy.