Saturday, March 14, 2015

Ode to a Young Girl's Butt

What do you want to know?  What do you want to hear?  I might be able to tell you if I only knew.  But this morning I sit dumbfounded.  I am unprepared to tell tales of Ali Baba though that seems to be what is called for.  All I have are the common complaints, and that just isn't good writing.  Perhaps I should compose an ode to the model's terrific bum.  She is full of figure.  She is young.  That bum will not hold up so well with time. 

"Hey--that's no ode!" 

I just Googled "Ode to a Young Girl's Ass" and got two things.  The first was an article in the Village Voice that starts, "Young and Anal."  The second was Coleridge's "Ode to an Ass."  Neither is quite what I am looking for, but the search leads me to believe that no one is really writing about the beauty of a young girl's bum.  Surely if I searched for "Ode to a Young Boy's Butt" I'd come away with many, many poems. 

Just did the search.  Nothing.  Really?  Nobody is writing famously about the attraction of youthful bums?  Maybe it is too dangerous a thing to do.  Not good for the career and all that.  I probably just got put on some list for Googling it.  

I remember an old guy talking about the conformity at the factory as "people all lining up nuts to butts."  I always liked that one.  Nuts to butts had always meant something different to me. 

I just wrote a short poem to butts.  It turned disgustingly saccharine very quickly. 

It's a good thing that I photograph them rather than write about them. 

It is Saturday and warm.  There will plenty of young butts on the Boulevard today.  I should go and make pictures.  I should make an album of pretty behinds.  Who wouldn't want that?  Rather, though, I will eat and drink and soak up the day.  I will talk about butts and bottoms and behinds instead.  I will talk plenty.  "Holy smokes!" I'll say, "Did you see that?"  "No, what?"  "Oh," I'll say, "it was simply marvelous.  Trust me on this.  I'm an expert." 

Aren't we all. 

I shall title this "Ode to a Young Girl's Butt."  That is guaranteed to bring a bunch of visitors to the site.


  1. My experience, both with my own skinny butt and with the butts of my models, is that the bigger butts holp up much better with time!
    They stay nice and full, while the skinny girl's butts just disappear by the time they are 40- 50.
    And the skin becomes ugly from sitting on the bone while the bigger ladies' skin stays soft as a babies' butt...

    But you wouldn't know that, would you...

    Nice butt indeed!



  2. By the way, did you know that if you want intelligent children you should choose a mother with a big butt?


  3. Little butts like big butts, and vice-versa. Italians have it down, I think. Italian butts are lovely in all shapes and forms. Female, I mean. Boy butts should always be skinny. From now on, though, I will only breast feed from big-bottomed women :)


  4. I agree on the boy butts!
    Still... they disappear as well, too soon, leaving something like a volcano crater.
    How about yours, when will you finally put your butt on a photo!?

    You can breast feed wherever you want, all help comes too late for you anyway, but I want to see those photos, too!