This is what my camera would look like if it was at my house and not in custody in NYC. I am despondent that I will ever receive the package. I filed a formal inquiry online about why my package is sitting in NYC. I got an automatic reply that the USPS had received my message. Later that day, I had an email from someone at my local post office, so after work, I went there. The fellow was really helpful. He tracked the passage the same way I do and said that it was still in NYC. Odd, I said, no? Perhaps it has fallen out of the system. Oh, no, he said. Once it is in the system, it is tracked. What should I do, I asked? All you can do is wait, he said. There isn't much else. But it was a two day delivery, I said. Well, they will have to give you your money back on that, he said. I felt much better after that.
When I got home, I went to the USPS site and got a phone number I could call. It was eight o'clock and the line was supposedly manned until eight-thirty. When I called, I was told by the automatic voice that I had a two to four minute wait. I was treated to some really bad music and messages about what sort of services the post office offers. Being a fairly intelligent man, I disconnected at eight-thirty now knowing much about the USPS.
I tracked my package again this morning. No update. Still sitting in Manhattan, it says. Is it possible that I will never get the package and never get an answer? I bought this camera for a great price that I doubt I could match again. Will the post office offer to buy me a replacement?
Of course not.
I try to be zen about things I can't control. This is difficult by design, of course. Things have always been thus. I want to blame it on government or republicans or big business, but it would have been like this at any time. This is the way life is. It is the way things go.
Each night, I have dreamed of the pictures I would take, dreamed of shooting in black and white. I've read every review of the camera, watched every video. It is camera porn. Pure, delicious unreconciled desire.
"Wouldn't you like some of this?" it teases.
"Yes, yes. I would."
Tonight is the Blue Moon, of course. I used to be the only one in history ever to watch the moon. Now it is part of the news cycle. Everyone knows all about Blue Moons now. It may be my fault. I think I was the one who brought it so much to the public eye.
Who knows. Maybe Frank had something to do with it, too.