Wednesday, July 13, 2022

I Shouldn't Tell You. . . But I Will

A perfectly good shot.  A good picture, I think.  Wait.  Look closely at the right hand side of the frame.  Or left.  The right hand side facing you. See the color variation. I think I didn't have enough developer in the tank to cover the entire image.  That is what I am guessing, anyway.  I didn't notice this when I cooked it up.  Then I did.  There are so many mistakes to be made.  I make them all.  

Last night the full moon was invisible here, obscured by a constant layer of clouds.  I only went out once to see, but it looked fairly impossible that the moon would show.  I came inside and checked my horoscope.  I was certain that it would say that everything was against me, that I should take to my bed and stay there until my cosmic horror show had passed.  

Nope.  

It must be me.  I'm just out of step with everything.  But it doesn't seem like "me" to me.  It seems like everyone else.  It used to be fun to be the smartest person in the room.  Now. . . it is merely frustrating.  

You think I'm being arrogant.  I'm not.  I'm the only one in the room.  

I have a date to visit the museum at Country Club College today that I totally forgot about.  There had been no communication about it since last week.  I got a text this morning asking if I still wanted to go.  I said I could.  I'm in limbo at present.  

No longer.  She cancelled.  It's all good.  My life is as exciting as the long walk I plan to take alone through suburban neighborhoods.  I wouldn't want to upset those incredible plans.  Stability.  Like a concrete pier.  

(Spirit Coach)--"Why don't you try to think of something positive today.  Get comfortable in a sitting position and breathe.  Listen to your breath and concentrate on just that.  On your last inhale, hold it for thirty seconds and then give a big exhale.  Sit quietly.  Try to envision something that brings you happiness.  Be charitable.  Be forgiving.  Bring yourself to a place of peace."

(Me)--"O.K."  

I don't have a Spirit Coach, of course.  I'd get irritated and argumentative quickly although there IS research that provides evidence of the benefits from such practices. 

The 1/6 Committee Hearings yesterday were good.  I think about a dozen of us are still watching.  Polls show that people are not that interested.  Their concerns, it seems, are about more immediate things.  People's attention spans are ever shrinking.  There is data that shows that, too.  The internet has rewired the human brain in very short order.  Is that bad?  It is just organisms adapting to a new environment, I guess, one where everything is quick.  I really have trouble remembering an adult life without the internet even though I lived for many adult years without even a television or a phone.  Those were years of concentrated reading and travel, my personal "Razor's Edge."  Travel now is something different.  Everyone is doing it.  Everyone is there.  And everyone is posting immediate selfies of what they are doing, eating, drinking.  They are connected.  Satellite.com--the connected horde.  

I'm guilty (if guilt is apropos), too.  

Help me.  I want to spread the idea that all the pan and epidemics we are experiencing were brought by aliens in spaceships that landed on earth.  Republicans will eat that shit up.  It will light up FaceBook and Twitter and TikTok.  People who have seen spaceships or aliens will come forward to tell their tales.  Then there will be a call for Congressional hearings on the matter.  QAnon will be screaming that there is a worldwide conspiracy between governments to cover up the evidence.  Then Bolsonaro in Brazil can confirm that, indeed, he has personally seen aliens and has firsthand information that all of that is true.  Soon some crazy theories on how to inoculate yourself will spread.  "Drinking your own urine is a preventative," they will say.  "Even Ghandi followed that practice."

Even if I'm the only one in the room, the public idiocy we are living through is maddening.  

"Why'd you take a picture of tires?"

"I thought they looked cool."  

"Huh."



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