Saturday, April 18, 2015

Complainer's Gotta Complain

All this technology takes up so much time.  Trying to be tech savvy enough to keep all my computers and phones synched, updating my mother's software and troubleshooting for her. . . .  Right now I am trying to recover all the contacts I had on my old phone.  It means I have to go back into an older computer and update all the apps, etc.  I am having fits.  Apple used to be easy.  It was all easy.  Nothing is easy any more and I wonder--is it me?  I end up with so many passwords, I can't remember any of them.  I have answered so many password questions and reset so many times, I don't even remember what my favorite car was or my favorite job.  Whatever. 

My nerves are frayed anyway.  I drink too much to relieve the stress and wake in the morning with a heaviness that is confounding. I am making mistakes and bad decisions that complicate my once simple life.  I find I do not want to perform in the off hours and am prepared to die alone. 

Dreadful talk for a pretty Saturday morning.  I must find some bliss today someway.  A walk through some gardens, maybe, or a trip to the beach.  I don't know.  My ass seems heavy and anchored to the chair.  Maybe I am only made for sitting any more.  Sitting and waiting for the beating. 

Enough of that.  I'll stop it.  There is hot coffee and hot blueberry pie.  I will take some pleasure there.

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